Surgery for the soul.

Beauty is more than what you see on the outside; the colour of your skin really doesn’t matter, we are all beautiful. So what! you have long hair, I like mine just the way it is……………that’s what we tell everyone, that’s what we tell ourselves over and over again but do we really believe it, is it really the truth?

People have always criticized each other, we are always in a competition and it has been like that for a very long time; the difference between now and the old days is that today we do everything in public, where everyone can see or hear what we say. Our grandmothers believed that white people were beautiful and sexy because they have silky hair and light skin, they believed that they are much clever than the dark skinned man and woman; through their teachings and stories we grew up believing that, worshipping them and wanting to be just like them.

Today, with technology all that knowledge spread like a plague in a small town.

Taking a look at the media industry and all that it consists of; they have tried to add diversity and preach the words “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder” but that only made things worse because they did that in theory, in practice everything was still the same.

It is as though they have created a platform where different races can debate and mock each other publicly. One minute being brown and thick is the in thing, months later we back to being skinny and light; the American celebrities wear Ox blood red coats then suddenly it is the colour for winter; Solange Knowles starts wearing clothes made of traditional fabrics from South Africa and Africa as a whole……guess what it’s a trend called tribal. Everything is decided for us and we keep following these trends allowing rich people to dictate us. How long are we going to live like a hamster on the hamster wheel running in circles, getting to nowhere land? 

When we talk about beauty, we are talking about how you look physically and how you carry yourself as an individual; these days you need to look beautiful on the outside for anyone to even give you 5 minutes of their time or at least have money and influence.

Listening to the song “Pretty hurts” by Beyoncé, i had an epiphany, everything made sense and I was determined to make small changes in my life, the truth is we are too far off to be something else, to see the world differently; one way or the other the media has an influence on us, it has us looking and wanting more and best believe it will deliver. Their job is to set trends, inform us and make us believe we want something even if we don’t need it; but do they deserve to be blamed for everything?

In the song Beyoncé starts off by saying “Mama said you’re a pretty girl what’s in your head it doesn’t matter, brush your hair fix your teeth, what you wear is all that matters”. As a young girl, our mothers have always told us to look beautiful; straighten ourselves and look presentable in public. From a small age we have been cute dolls who parade the streets with our parents for everyone to examine and cheer for. We grow up to love the attention, we loved hearing that we are much prettier than the other children, we have longer hair and longer smiles and that we would grow up to be heartbreakers. That all fades away with age not because we are no longer beautiful but because we have grown up and nobody sees it necessary to stop you in the streets to adore you, but it’s at that time that you need the attention the most; because now you are experiencing changes and learning to make your own decisions which can either make you or break you.

I met up with a few aspiring models in Devland at a fashion week hosted by the SAFC held at Rutz pub, their age ranged between 18-26 years old and I asked them what do they think beauty is?

They all said beauty is how a person holds themselves, their attitude and how they treat others. That’s a good definition and to an extend it is true but not realistic, we live in a different world where outside appearances matter, will get you a job and make your life better. What’s sad is, most of these models didn’t believe in what they were saying, therefore should they make it to mainstream modelling they will fall victim to scams, many of them will end up doing surgical procedures to change their appearances and fall sick chasing a dream or should I say “FAME”.

Our communities, families, friends, educators and the media are liable. They have the most influence in our lives; we go to them for guidance, we tell them our secrets, they raised us, taught us everything we know and entertained us. The cycle will continue as we all grow up and teach our children the very same thing.

We may not be able to reverse the damage done to our self-esteems or even censor the information that the media gives us but we can censor the influence it has on us and our children.

The song ends by saying “Perfection is the disease of the nation, you trying to fix something but you can’t fix something that you can’t see, and it’s the soul that needs the surgery, aint got no doctor or pill that can take the pain away the pain is inside and nobody frees you from nobody, it’s the soul, the soul that needs surgery”.

In the end no matter how many plastic surgeries you do, lies you tell and fake smiles you practice; it will all still be there, the pain of not being able to love yourself the way you are and the inability to accept yourself with no conditions. If you do not learn to love yourself, you will live your whole life for other people, changing your form to such an extent that even your parents won’t be able to recognise you and even then you will still not be happy.

Instead of mirroring and seeking for the parts of the body that are unpleasing to you, try and find the one that pleases you. Let those spots be the first thing you look at in the morning, do not depend on the next person to tell you that you are beautiful, keep telling yourself that “I am beautiful” over and over again until you believe it and lastly smile genuinely.

We were made differently for a reason and guess what……there will always be someone more beautiful than the one you compare yourself to. Beauty is really in the eye of the beholder, accept yourself and be happy with whom you are and you will soon realise how better everything will be. 

Rea VaYA Rebels

Dear Blog.....

I wanted to write an article about my experience with the Rea Vaya today but I couldn’t find the right words to say, so I decided to just tell you what happened without involving a lot of politics. So this is an informal post which is based on what I heard, my opinion and what I feel about todays incident.

I catch a bus at Civic Centre in Braamfontein to Thokoza Park where I’ll be connected to a bus to my neighbourhood. Everything was going well and today I was on bus number 7044

   BUS WITH THE BUSTED WHEEL                                                                 

but just as we pass Moroka Police station; a few streets down we hear a weird and loud sound that scares some passengers and as we look around we notice that one of the wheels on the bus busted and was wrenched off the rim. That freaked me out but I soon calmed down as the driver took control of the situation.

BUS DRIVER COLLECTING WHAT REMAINED OF THE WHEEL

In the end we all went into the bus that was behind us, even though it beyond ‘overload’ we all understood that it was necessary and so we got home safely.

That is but only one misfortune that turned out good in the end, what if this happens again but this time people get hurt; it is good that the bus does not open it doors whilst it is moving bt from time to time you find the bus doors opening and closing without control sometimes it won’t even open at all. The buses are often late especially Braamfontein T2 in the morning at the Thokoza Park station, people will be forced to ride the T3 which takes too long to get to Braamfontein where we have to take another bus ‘C3’ in order to get to our respective destinations.

This is not the only thing that angers the people; the fact that the bus fare has increased ever since the smartcard has been introduced doesn’t sit well with commuters. The scanning machines sometimes do not work and people end up paying penalty fees due to malfunctioning scanning machines which is totally not their fault. Checking the balance on the smartcard has proved to be a nightmare, people who stay in townships such as Naledi, Tladi, Dhlamini, Protea Glen etc cant load money onto the card or even check their balance all because they do not have Rea Vaya stations around them the nearest being Thokoza Park where you will pay a taxi fare of R7.50 just to get there.

In town when you try to load the smartcard it’s either the agent doesn’t know exactly what they are doing or the lines are really long and the buses keep leaving you behind.

We have all grown to love and adore the BRT but something needs to be done about these small problems because that’s how it all starts and before you know it; Rea Vaya will be like the shosholoza Meyl train; unsafe, dirty and  overcrowded.